


A day at the 'Europapark' - with 13 dwarves

by Belsmomaus



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
Genre: Amusement Park, Second-Person Narrative, mild swearing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-17
Updated: 2014-11-30
Packaged: 2018-02-25 19:48:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2634029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Belsmomaus/pseuds/Belsmomaus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ever wondered how a day at an amusement park would be like with our well-known 13 dwarves in tow?</p><p>Then figure it out!<br/>Everything's written in second-person narrative, so it's actually YOU who experiences this day :-)</p><p>First chapter: Let's start easy on the dwarves with a nice ride in the Swiss Bob Run.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Eenie meenie miney moe...

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter starts shortly after you've entered the park. The dwarves have no real concept of what will await them - as you haven't told them - but they will soon learn!
> 
> The 'Europapark' is probably the biggest amusement park in Germany with lots of interesting rides and roller coasters and much more stuff. 
> 
> Each chapter focuses on one attraction and a small group of dwarves.
> 
> Two chapters are ready yet, some others are waiting to be translated and the rest will have to be written first.

 

** Eenie meenie miney moe… **

 

 “Looks totally different here,” Bofur observes.

“That’s how it’s supposed to be. Each part of this park is modelled on a country, which means a region with different government, different customs and so on. Earlier we’ve been in Italy, a country in the south where it’s warm throughout the year with lots of sunshine and all but now we’re in Switzerland. It’s in the middle of a mountain chain. That’s why it looks different,” you explain with a look at the mountain huts and cobblestones.

Even Thorin takes a look around, although a bored one. “Quite a lot of effort for something that’s only purpose is amusement.”

You decide to ignore him. Instead you lead your companions deeper into the swiss village to a small round square.

“What’s that?” Gloin asks looking up and pointing towards the white construction over your heads.

You don’t need to explain anything as in that exact moment a wagon of the ‘Swiss Bob Run’ rattles past.

Sceptically Balin’s gaze follows it. “It wasn’t even anchored to the rail construction…” he mumbles thoughtfully.

“That looks dangerous!”

You wouldn’t have needed to turn around to know that that sentence could only come from Dori. You shake your head and sigh.

“So, who’s coming with me?”

Suddenly you face a wall of silence. Most of them look up and consider the rail construction with different levels of scepticism.

“You _can_ remember that you promised me – not even an hour ago – that you would enjoy yourself and that I wouldn’t have to do anything alone?”

“Yeah, but that was before we knew what to expect!” Gloin tries to defend them.

You grimace disappointed. “Then you shouldn’t have promised! So?“

But still the same wall of silence.

“Okay, then the old fashioned way. Eenie meenie miney moe, catch a tiger by the toe…”

Without batting an eye you start counting while the dwarves are watching you with strange looks as if they thought you totally mental now. But you don’t mind them. “…eenie meenie miney moe. Great, we have a volunteer!“

At the same moment you grab Dwalin’s hand and pull him along. The dwarf, taken by surprise, first wants to object, but then he rolls his eyes and resigns himself to his fate. Again he takes a quick glance at the construction overhead. “Which material is this made of, anyway?”

You shrug your shoulders. “No idea. Metal?”

You’ve just turned the corner when Fili and Kili come running after you.

“We’ve changed our mind! Could be fun,” Fili grins.

Dwalin raises an eyebrow. „Very good, then I can go now.”

But you quickly grab his lower arm. “No way, mister. You stay here. It’s two persons per wagon and that’s the reason why you will still join us!“

With a grumpy grunt he turns around and trudges up the little hill to the ‘rail station’.

You have to queue up for a bit, but you use the time to explain to the three dwarves that this rollercoaster is supposed to simulate a ride with a bobsled in an ice track. And of course you also explain why anyone would do such a thing willingly and as a sport. You’re doing quite well at it until you reach the building itself and see the first wagon running in.

“And just like in a bobsled you sit in front of each other. Usually the smaller one in the front seat.”

Dwalin’s eyes widen before they contract to slits, his nasal wings bloating furiously. “No way! Forget it! I won’t sit on anyone’s lap like a toddler!“

Now you understand what the actual problem is. “That has nothing to do with that. It’s just that everybody is supposed to see something while on the ride. If I sit in front of you, you only see the back of my head the whole time.”

And it’s going on like this until it’s your turn. Fili and Kili get a big bang out of your quarrelling – other visitors, too, obviously, considering some of the staring and grinning faces around you.

“I promised that you wouldn’t have to do anything alone. I never promised to let me get treated like a child.”

Irritated and definitely resigned you sigh. “Very well, feel free to sit on the backseat. Suit yourself!”

Fili and Kili climb into the last wagon – without any discussion at all they heed your advice and Fili takes the front seat – while Dwalin takes the wagon in front of them. You are just in the process of sitting down between his legs when an older guy climbs into the wagon in front of you. Alone. Quickly you pull the safety stirrup down.

That’s when Dwalin’s voice hisses in your ear. “You can also sit alone in one of these?”

Now you really have to grin, fortunately he can’t see that. “But where’s the fun in that?” And to make your point you press yourself close to his chest and wiggle a bit to find the perfect place to lean against. An angry growl is the answer, together with a harsh pull on the security stirrup. You let out a startled squeak as you feel the sudden – and almost painful – pressure against your belly and thighs. The shuddering of the chest in your back leaves no doubt that Dwalin is laughing at your expense.

The wagon starts to move and leaves the station behind. After the first bend it’s being pulled upwards.

_That begs for revenge_!

This time you don’t hold on to something like normally. _This_ time you let gravity pull you back down completely.

A quiet groan behind you recompenses you. “Ey, lassie!”

You lean your head back over his shoulder to innocently smile at him from the side. “Oops.”

Dwalin obviously wants to retort something, but at that moment you reach the top. He instantly falls silent as he notices the height. You can actually feel his whole body tensing up behind you.

Your wagons roll into the track and gather speed in the first turn. You pat Dwalin’s right knee, even though you’re not sure if you want to reassure or irk him. “Relax! It’s really fun!”

It’s to no avail anyways considering that he clamps on the stirrup so hard when the first drop approaches that his knuckles turn white.

Your bob dips. And while you feel for the first time that day how your stomach lifts – even if only softly with this harmless drop – you hear a surprised ‘oh’ behind you.

In no time you’re slowed down again and you leave the top to start the bendy part of the drive. At some time between right and left and right again you feel that Dwalin’s tension eases and he finally relaxes. His fingers lie only loosely on the stirrup until he even raises his hand to put in on your shoulder.

Only to push you aside.

“I can’t see anything.”

“Told you so!”

You can clearly hear the shouts of joy from both Durin heirs.

Dwalin even leans into the last two curves while you wave at your friends on the ground.

Finally you roll out and through some buildings back onto the rails.

“That was fun, wasn’t it?” You ask, although it was more of a rhetorical question.

He claps you on your shoulder. “It’s indeed bearable.”

“AGAIN!” The excited cries resound from behind you.

Dwalin only shakes his head while you just have to grin at so much enthusiasm. If those two only knew what else was still awaiting them…

You stop and you just now realise that the stirrup’s actually quite tight. But you’re able to open it and you climb over Dwalin’s leg to get out where Kili and Fili were already jumping up and down like Duracell-bunnies.

“That was great!”

“Yeah, let’s do it again!”

Eventually Dwalin gets up too and you put the brothers off till later (“There are lots of other things here which are at least as much fun as this!”)

At a leisurely pace and with a certain swing to your steps you get back to the others who examine you sceptically. Which wasn’t astonishing, really, given the stupid grins on Fili’s and Kili’s faces.

You’re sure that you’ll see this adrenalin-rollercoaster-grin again today.

Thorin shakes his head wordlessly at his nephews who both seem at least 20 years younger all of a sudden.

Instead Balin steps up to Dwalin, worried about his brother. “You alright, brother?”

The bald dwarf starts to laugh. „Everything’s fine. You should test the ice track yourself.“

With these words he leaves his brother behind and follows the others who are already leaving the village. After a last glance upwards, just to be sure, Balin eventually asks:

“Ice?”

 

 


	2. Neither safe nor good

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The 'Poseidon' is a mix between rollercoaster and a water fun ride.  
> But there are some - or one - who do not deem it safe.  
> So it's time for a test ride!

 

**_Neither safe nor good_ **

 

 You stand there with a pleased smile on your face and your hands on the rough rope-network that surrounds the water. Your gaze – like that of most others too – rests on the massive blue metal construction over the water. At least they gaze at it until loud screaming turns their attention on one of the boats that plunges down until it clashes onto the water, creating a huge wave of water around it.

“Looks almost higher than the other one,” Dwalin muses. One look at his face is enough to tell you that the ‘height’- part was the only thing he hasn’t liked about the bob run.

“And wetter,” Oin states unnecessarily – but all the more dry.

Bouncing in anticipation you turn around. “So? Who’s coming? Or do I have to pick at will again?“

Dwalin raises his hands in defence. “Without me, lass. I’ve just done my bit!”

Balin and Oin quickly bluff it out on their age – for the moment you’ll let it pass, but not forever. To your surprise even Fili and Kili decline, but soon afterwards they put their heads together again and speak animatedly. They look at a place somewhere behind the artificial sea that’s part of the funfair ride. And you think you know why…

That’s when you notice Ori, watching the boats sailing over the water or sliding swiftly over the rails with interest.

“Ori, are you up for it?” You ask him directly.

But before the young dwarf even has the chance to say something Dori’s in front of you. “Under no circumstances will Ori set foot into that thing!” To give more importance to his words he indicates the whole ride with his rapid moving hands. “It’s way too dangerous! Such a monstrosity can neither be safe nor good!”

You’re just about to roll your eyes at this amount of overprotectiveness and anxiety, when you’ve got an idea. “Of course, I understand. But I can assure you, everything in the park here is absolutely safe and checked regularly. I’ve been in there loads of times and I always made it back out in one piece. But if you don’t trust my judgement, you can test it yourself. And if you deem the ride safe Ori can join us next time.”

Ori looks a bit crestfallen since you haven’t taken his side directly, but Nori susses you immediately. And while Dori is still taken by surprise Nori ups the ante with an innocent smile. “Yeah, great idea. Check the safety for us, brother!”

Indignant Dori puffs up and you see immediately that he wants to refuse. So you grab for Ori’s hand and pull him off a few steps in the direction of the Poseidon entrance. “Okay, then we go without a test!”

Quickly Dori overruns you and clutches your lower arm tightly. He pushes Ori aside and stands up tall in front of you with his shoulders proudly pulled back. He takes a deep breath. “Very well, I come with you and test the monstrosity. But I’m sure I won’t approve it.”

Ori’s downcast that he’s not allowed to go, but Nori can’t hide his mischievous gloating.

You shrug and turn towards the others. “Anyone else? Last chance, guys!”

Nondescript murmuring starts; you think you can hear something like ‘let Dori check this out for now’. In the end Bofur takes a step towards you. “What the heck. I’m in.“

“I’ve got the feeling this will only get worse. So, I’ll rather get this over with now.” With these words Gloin steps up.

Since no one else stirs you say goodbye and go off towards the entrance after you show the others from with direction you’ll come back.

This time you also don’t get far until Kili shouts after you. “What’s the best way to that observation platform over there?” You don’t have to look to know where he’s pointing at. It’s just like you guessed few minutes earlier.

Grinning you wave them over. “This way!”

The next moment the brothers are at your side. Together you follow the path throw stone arches until you show the Durins where to go. The remaining four of you trail the path again towards the first greek buildings, up the stairs and through the caves of Odysseus.

Since you fear Dori might run away if you take the time for a stop to tell them something about Odysseus you leave it be. You lead them past statues instead, onto a balcony and finally into the great hall where you can watch the other people entering and exiting the boats. It’s still early and only few people are here so you won’t have to wait long.

You step into the queue. Next to you Dori is nervously hopping from one foot to the other while Gloin tries to give a stoic impression. Bofur on the other hand watches everything intently and soon starts to bombard you with questions.

“Is there a difference between sitting on the left or the right side?”

“Is the view in the back row as good as in the front row?”

“The buildings here look totally different again. Different country, isn’t it? Again one with much sunshine?”

It doesn’t take long with all those questions to shorten the wait. But in your boat only the first and the last row are free.

“Not in the front! No way!” Dori protests, so you take the last row and leave the first one to Bofur and Gloin.

Underestimating the depths of the interior Dori almost falls into the boat. Quickly you grab his arm to support him and climb in afterwards. Dori shifts around on his seat next to you, he’s clearly uncomfortable with the whole situation. Then the stirrups come down. He presses his one down so hard you can practically see it squeezing his thighs. To calm him down a bit you lay a hand on his one and he halts in his fidgeting.

“That’s enough, believe me. Nothing will happen to you in here. Apart from bruising your thighs if you push it down even harder.”

Not reassured Dori looks away and straight forward. You do the same and you can see Bofur’s signature hat, as well as Gloin’s red hair.

_The hair!_

It strikes you like lightning. You should have told Gloin to tie his hair and beard together – at least the beard! But know you can only shrug. It’s too late anyway.

With a start the boat begins to move and softly glides down into the water. Nonetheless besides you Dori startles and at once holds onto his stirrup for dear life.

You can’t help but ask yourself if this behaviour would go on like this for the rest of the day.

“Nothing will happen here, just gentle sailing,” you explain and lean back, relaxed, to enjoy the epic music they play in the simulated ruins.

Dori listens as well. You have to smirk when he states in surprise that the music sounds quite acceptable.

But then chain and rails turn up in front of you. With a fierce jerk the boat is pulled out of the water, making Dori jump again in fright. You hope he won’t break his stirrup from clenching down on it.

His eyes get bigger and bigger the higher you climb. Even though it worries him he’s not able to look away. You raise your arm to point to the right: “No reason to panic, okay? That thing over there, that’s _really_ high!”

His gaze follows your arm over to the Silverstar. You can practically see his blood fleeing his face. His hands turn white from strain.

Finally you’re up and the boat is released onto the rails. The dwarf at your side instantly tenses up. And as he notices the deep drop in front of him he closes his eyes, tight. While you enjoy the feeling of being pulled out of your seat Dori only moans distressed. Not until occasional drops of water hit his face does he open his eyes again. He sighs relieved upon realising that he’s back down and still alive.

You can only shake your head at this. “Come on, it wasn’t that bad.”

The only answer is a sinister look from the side, so you decide to concentrate on other things. You can spot Bifur at the waterfront, waving in your direction. The others are not far behind. Grinning you give a wave back.

Slowly you change direction and now you discover Fili and Kili at the platform that gets drowned each time by the splashing water of boats hitting the water surface. They try to trump each other in standing still for as long as possible before running away without getting wet. Curious, you watch them when the next boat whooshes down. They stay there, focused, gaze halfway turned towards the water, halfway towards the other, ready to jump away at any moment. But this time they miscalculate. A hearty laugh escapes you when the wave hits them head-on.

But then Dori gasps again as he observes the same boat – to be precise: the plume of water and the steep drop of the rails.

“No. This is definitely not suitable for Ori!” He animatedly shakes his head.

You can only raise an eyebrow, sceptical, while your boat is jumpily pulled up the next slope. “I think you’d be surprised if you would just let him be himself for once.”

Beside you, Dori’s breathing deeply and he tries to watch out for his surroundings as less as possible. But when he notices how steep the rails are going down, success evades him.

His hands clamp down on the stirrup again and he even tries to anchor himself with his feet against the walls of the boat. You dip forward and a second later you actually tilt down into the deep. Surrounded by artificial mist you can hear Dori screaming.

Swiftly you hit the water. Loud laughter sounds from the front – you’re quite sure, it’s Bofur.

At that very instant a huge gush of water splashes against your faces and chests. The last row often bears the brunt of the water, but Dori has chosen to sit there instead of in the front. Quickly you check yourself with a scrutinizing look down. Yeah, your thighs were wet, but mostly around the knees, and the stains on your shirt would soon dry – fortunately you haven’t opted for the white shirt this morning.

You shake the water off your right arm when you spot Dori, who’s as wet as you are, wiping the water from his eyes, piqued, and with a mix of surprise and disgust on his face.

You can’t help yourself, you have to laugh at that. And his sinister glance to the side only makes it worse.

“This is not funny!” he growls.

“Well,” you chuckle, “according to their opinion it is!” You nod towards the waterfront where your companions lean against the banister and at least some of them laugh heartily at your expense.

“Normally you undo your braids before washing your hair, Dori!” Nori shouts towards you. Angry – but mostly offended – Dori crosses his arms in front of his chest.

In the end you unhurriedly ride back towards the entry area and climb out of your boats. As soon as Dori is on terra firma again he looks down at himself and stalks scowling – and wet – towards the exit. You wait for Bofur and Gloin. Both of them got away relatively dry, though Gloin still looks rather tousled.

At the photo booth you catch up with Dori who’s looking up into the air, one hand raised as if to check for wind and still mumbling quietly into his beard.

“This was fantastic!” Bofur praises the ride enthusiastically.

Gloin snorts. “That’s because you could actually _see_ what was happening!”

Bofur leans close to you to whisper conspiratorially into your ear: “His beard was covering his face. The whole time!” He spots something behind you and points towards your picture. “Just like that!”

It _is_ a hilarious sight. You’re sitting in the boat beaming with joy, Dori beside you with his eyes tightly closed and his mouth opened for a terrified shriek. All the while Bofur is grinning like mad and Gloin… well… the only thing you can actually see is a mop of red hair. His beard has flipped upwards and covered his whole face.

You just have to have this picture. It doesn’t take much time to buy it and soon you’re leaving. The others are already waiting for you. Kili and Fili next to the others look like drowned rats.

Confused Bofur raises an eyebrow. “What happened to _you_? You’re even more soaked than Dori!”

Thorin rolls his eyes. “Those _idiots_ placed themselves beneath a wave.”

Gloin shakes his head, all the while smirking, but the brothers only shrug their shoulders good-naturedly.

Nori and Ori push themselves through the others towards Dori – Ori expectant and Nori with an almost pained expression on his face. As if he wanted nothing more than to grin and gloat, but was frantically trying not to.

“Well?” Ori dares to ask.

Even before Dori has a chance to answer you interrupt and ask Dori yourself: “Indeed, what do you say? The ride was safe, you weren’t hurt or anything else and the whole time you’ve been securely in your seat, haven’t you?”

With a grumpy look Dori stares at you. “It may be true that it’s safe, yes. But Ori won’t set foot into that thing, under any circumstances! It’s way too unnerving! And in the end he gets a cold as well!”

Nori rolls his eyes – together with some others – and kneads the bridge of his nose with an ‘Mahal, give me strength’ expression on his face. Ori on the other hand is crestfallen and mopes. Fili and Kili only look at each other, frowning: “A cold? Seriously?“

You breathe deeply and decide that it’s time for Ori to have some fun.

Right away!

Without waiting you grab his hand. „I have an idea. I know exactly the ride for you!“

You give him a mischievous grin and pull him away, leaving the greek part of the park behind you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know my portrayal of Dori isn't really in character. Well, I have merely over-exaggerated some of his traits.  
> But if it was too much, just let me know!


	3. Where there are people there’s also Coca Cola

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Dori's encounter with greek water fun rides it's finally Ori's turn. And this time you won't let Dori come between Ori and the fun he deserves!

 

**_Where there are people there’s also Coca Cola_ **

  

“What is that thing?” Oin asks bewildered.

You look up to the huge silver globe behind you and shrug.

“I’m not telling. I’ll only say one thing,” you turn towards Dori, “it is absolutely safe!”

You continue towards Ori: “Well? Brave enough to dare the unknown?”

Ori eyes the – truly nondescript – globe with scepticism, but soon he notices the excited children leaving the extraordinary ‘building’, all the while talking their parents’ ears off. Determined he squares his shoulders and nods finally.

Again Dori wants to say something but you interrupt him early on. “No, this time I take Ori with me. But I promise he won’t get wet!”

“Oh, and this ride we’re doing alone!” you tell the others. “Ori can tell you afterwards if it’s worth it.” You point towards two empty benches in direct sunshine not far from you. With a look at the young heirs of Durin you add: “Maybe you should sprawl in the sun to dry a bit.”

Fili frowns at you. “What about you? You’re wet, too.“

You only grin. “I’ll dry in the airflow!”

With these words you place your arm around Ori’s shoulders and gently push him towards the entry. He stops, clearly confused, at the robot next to the entry when it suddenly starts talking with a tinny voice.

“What…?” he asks with a questioning look towards you.

You rather put it off immediately. “Just ignore it.” To explain a robot to a dwarf, well, there are limits, even to your willingness and patience.

You take great delight in watching Ori. The way he’s observing all the strange things around him with big eyes. There’s the turnstile that dazzles him for a while, and the escalator which makes him stop until you guide him onwards with a ‘just step on it’. However, the Eurosat’s entry area is really full of sensory input.

Dim lights, interspersed with colourful blinking lights, reflected by the silver interior.

Wiry sounding voices talking nonstop.

Loud techno music – definitely strange for dwarven ears.

It’s easy to spot his unease and his edginess. But as he notices you watching him, he actually looks at you and you can see the anticipation and pride in his eyes. At least you have chosen him alone to discover the secret of the Eurosat.

And to be honest: he has been in dire need of it!

At first you try to explain all the stuff around you to him, but as he asks you about the meaning of the sentence ‘where there are people there’s also Coca Cola’ and why the guy and the can are floating in the air (actually an astronaut in outer space), you accept defeat.

Few minutes later you reach the real entry and as soon as you queue up at one of the last wagons there are finally less enough people so Ori is also able to see what’s in wait for him.

“It’s a rollercoaster. In the dark.”

Ori frowns thoughtfully. “Like the ride Dwalin did earlier?”

You shake your head. “More like Poseidon, the one Dori tested. Only without the water. And different vehicles.“

You’re next and Ori’s jittery anticipation has affected you as well.

Your wagon arrives and you let him in first. After closing your stirrups you move forwards into the darkness where you’re pulled upwards, surrounded by deep blackness and loud techno sound.

“I thought it would be darker, but I can still see everything.”

In a typical Homer-Simpson-moment you grimace and with a ‘duh’ you try to not slap your hand against your brow. “Oh, I’m such an idiot. Of course, the eyes of dwarves are used to the dark. Well, I’m not sure if that’s to your advantage or disadvantage in here…”

Attentively Ori looks to the left where small openings permit short looks into the inside of the globe now and again. You can’t see much, but the rattling of other wagons and the cries of their passengers ring out.

“And this is fun?” Ori asks doubtful.

“Oh yes! Yes it is! But you should hold on tight. This ride is a bit… rougher… than the other ones.”

The countdown sounds. You don’t mind it at the beginning until you suddenly realize that you’re already up and that it’s _your_ countdown.

“At the count of zero it starts!”

Both of you hold on to the stirrups.

The ride is as bumpy as ever – but you wouldn’t want it any other way. Both of you bump against the side of your wagon a few times, yet Ori’s eyes are widely open – if your eyes aren’t deceiving you after adapting to the semidarkness. His mouth is also open, somewhere between a laugh and a scream, though a silent one. At least until your wagon dips to the left after a long series of curves to the right. Now he starts cheering, finally.

But that’s not all as you learn a moment later.

“That beats everything! It’s awesome!” Ori’s whooping next to you.

And you’re immensely happy for that.

The frenzy of speed seizes you both. In the lower areas of the ride it feels faster – probably because of the more narrow curves – and you hear Ori’s surprised squeak when the wagon suddenly dips down a notch only to hurry past some planets or meteorites or whatever those things were supposed to be. However the next moment Ori laughs again, only louder.

You pass the brightly illuminated tunnel at the end that almost makes you blind for everything afterwards.

And you’re considering if you should warn him.

_No, everybody has to make that experience for himself._

The brakes don’t disappoint.

You brace yourself against the stirrup to lessen the force of impact a bit. Besides you, you can hear the quite familiar ‘umpf’ as Ori, surprised by the intensity of the sudden brake, is rudely pushed against his stirrup.

“That was unexpected,” he wheezes, winded.

“Yeah, that happens to everyone the first time. And that’s how it should be, even if the others might dare to check the Eurosat out, don’t you think?”

Ori grins at you almost devious and for the first time ever you notice the small similarities to Nori. “It would be a shame to withhold this experience from them!” he agrees dead serious.

You exit the wagon laughing. Ori can barely keep his excitement in check. That’s when you have an idea. A mean one.

“You’re in for teasing Dori a bit?”

Ori frowns a bit insecure, but then he nods with a shy smile. “Okay, what do you have in mind?”

 

And so you get onto the escalator back down a moment later. Your arm is around Ori’s shoulder who’s holding his belly and his face is pressed against your side – if only to conceal his grin. You stumble back outside – seemingly on wobbly legs – through the shop and over to the others.

As soon as Dori lays eyes on you he jumps up and hurries towards you. Nori is also immediately on his way, considering the appearance of his younger brother, but his eyes are trained for these kinds of subtleties. After a few steps he stops again, a knowing smirk on his face.

Worry is written all over Dori’s face. Without ceremony he snaps at you, furious: “What have you done to him? I have told you this would be…”

At that moment Ori starts giggling. He can barely utter the words “fooled you”.

Dori is totally confused at first, until he huffs, deeply offended. But obviously he’s at a loss for words right now.

You also cover the last meters to the others and Ori immediately tells everyone about the great ride you’ve had and that he’s been standing on moving stairs (even that can be an attraction!). But in the end he holds his belly nonetheless. “But you shouldn’t eat before going in…”

Fili and Kili are totally hooked after his explanation.

“We also want to confront the darkness bravely!”

You only raise an eyebrow.

“First of all it’s not really dark for you like we just realized. And second, if you really want to be brave, I mean REALLY brave then I’ve got something else for you. But this is only for really tough guys.”

A mix of curious and sceptic dwarves follows you around a corner.

Dori stumbles a step backwards, deathly pale – even though he’s seen it before.

Bifur starts hectically speaking in Khuzdul joined with Iglishmek gestures, as if one language isn’t enough at this point.

Fili only stares: “I’ll be blowed.”

“I’ve told you! It only gets worse!” Gloin states dryly.

Dwalin just raises an eyebrow, although he also looks a bit paler than usual – but you already know that he’s got a bit of a problem with heights. “Never in a million years!”

Even Bofur starts stuttering: “You must be joking!”

 


	4. I prefer ridiculous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time for a real rollercoaster now! And which one would be better than the second-highest in Europe?  
> Off we go for a Silverstar ride!  
> That leaves only one question: which of the dwarves is brave enough to face it?

 

**_I prefer ridiculous_ **

 

 

Even Bofur starts stuttering: “You must be joking!”

You shake your head and take a step back towards the rollercoaster to point upwards with one hand.

“This, my dear Bofur, is no joke. Quite the opposite, it’s the ultimate thrill. May I introduce: the Silverstar!”

Balin almost takes no heed of the rollercoaster at all – contrary to the other dwarves. Instead he pays attention to the people entering the building to go for a ride.

“By all appearances this is rather fit for a younger audience. Therefore I’m going to abstain here and give the young generation the advantage.”

You have to bite back a laugh at Ori’s horrified face at that words.

Oin joins Balin.

Dori is still staring up hypnotised and you start to wonder if he’s going to hyperventilate or not.

Ori next to him only stutters, insecure: “I don’t know?”

Nori on the other hand alternately looks up at the rails and listens to the cries of those falling at the first drop, then he gazes at the people exiting the building.

“Well, this one certainly looks like a thrill ride.” Unconscious of his move he steps closer to you. You can see it in his face that this coaster really intrigues him. Finally a dwarf without fear of heights!

Kili and Fili are whispering, though Kili seems to be the more active part. In the end he pulls Fili along by his sleeve towards you. “Come on, you coward!” But his voice sounds anything but firm and sure.

Smirking about those two you step aside to let a bigger group pass, only to bump into something. Startled you turn around to find the measuring stick.

_Oops, totally slipped my mind_.

“Oh, I almost forgot. The minimum height is higher here.”

Gloin approaches and eyes the post with a frown. He can’t cross under the slat, in fact, but he’s barely taller than the indicated 4 feet 7 inches. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Well, that you have to be taller than this,” you point at the slat, “otherwise you’re not allowed in.”

Nori joins you and stands next to the measuring stick, scrutinizing it; Kili shoves Fili forward to check their heights.

You realise at a glance that Fili can walk under the slat and apart from Nori’s hairstyle nothing would stop him from following Fili suit.

“Great, everything’s fine then!” Nori proclaimed and takes position next to you.

Mildly irritated you frown. “Ehm, Nori? Hair doesn’t count!“

He gives you a strange look, almost angry, as if you would begrudge him this fun or if you wouldn’t want him with you. But it was Gloin who asks the question ‘why’.

“Simple. The seats and security stirrups can only provide accurate protection if you’re at least 4 feet 7 inches tall.“ The next part you direct at Nori. “You wouldn’t want to slide out of your seat during the ride, would you?”

For a moment Nori regards you, silent. His gaze flickers towards the Silverstar. He swallows and pales a bit. Obviously he doesn’t like the idea of loosing his grip and getting lost involuntarily at this height and speed. “Not really, no.”

Nonetheless disappointed he withdraws to his brothers. You can clearly hear Dori hiss: “Are you crazy?”

“Well, that excludes me as well,” Fili assesses. Regarding his facial expression and the relieved lowering of his shoulders this excuse arrives at the opportune moment.

To cut this short you bend down at bit next to the measuring stick until your eyes are at level with the slat. A brief look is all it takes to determine the dwarves who meet the requirements.

“That leaves Oin who’s already declined, Gloin, Kili, Thorin, Bofur and Dwalin. So, who’s brave enough? There’re four seats in a row so it would be nice if at least three of you would join me.”

“Sorry, lass, but I won’t gamble on less than half an inch,” Gloin excuses himself – and you understand only too well. If you would be just a tiny bit taller than the minimum height you would have doubts as well.

Kili swallows and takes a deep breath. “Fine, I’m in.”

You notice the fleeting glance of Thorin at Kili at this announcement, even if it’s too fast to tell if it’s been an acknowledging one or not.

“Bofur?” you ask directly.

But he only lifts his hands in an objecting gesture and takes a step back. “Oh no, don’t look at me. Forget it! You can send me into the deepest mines, no problem, for my part you can place me in all the other rides we’ve crossed, their heights are reasonable. But THIS? I’m not a bird! No, no way, I’d rather test one of these thin pastry-things they sell back there.“

Without waiting for any answer he just turns and heads towards the Crepes-booth. Apparently he couldn’t have waited any longer to flee the line of fire.

“Bombur, you want one?”

And before you know it Bombur, as well as all three ‚ri‘-brothers, follow the dwarf with the funny hat.

Looking back to the rest of your group makes you grin. You wink at Thorin and Dwalin, inviting. “Perfect, exactly three persons left.”

“Oh no…” both of them start to try getting out of this affair.

“Come on, uncle!” Kili whined. It was obvious he’d like to have someone from his family or even a friend at his side for this.

“It’s really not as bad as it looks,” you reassure them until an idea comes to mind and a mischievous grin plays around your lips. “I didn’t deem you as cowards…”

Dwalin huffs: “Who are you calling a coward?”

However Thorin flashes his eyes at you, his gaze telling you very clearly that he knows you have the upper hand now. Your grin spreads even wider.

 

 

Sometime later you’re somewhere in the queue, surrounded by two murmuring dwarves – ‘what the hell am I doing here’ – and one quite jittery dwarf.

“How often have you been doing this already?” Kili asks to distract himself from his nervousness.

You need to think about that. “Well, I think, roughly… ten times? Maybe more often? I’m not exactly sure. Why’re you asking?“

„Ehm… no particular reason…“

Bit by bit you climb the last of the stairs and step into the upper hall with the entry area. Loud clanging of metal sounds through the room and red and green signals – similar to that of a formula 1 racing – throw their diffuse light upon the crowd. You notice that Thorin and Dwalin try to give an unperturbed impression. And that Kili repeatedly wipes his sweaty palms at his thighs.

Few meters in front of you is a woman with a long ponytail. And suddenly you remember again. Your hand’s in your pocket faster than you can think and produces a scrunchie. With quick and practised moves you pull your hair back and out of your face and tighten the tie in your neck. Another grasp and you bring forth a few surrogate scrunchies.

“Here. You should also tie your hair.”

Thorin’s confused. “Why?”

“Because the wind will knot it together. Believe me, you’ll end up all tangled and matted.”

Kili immediately takes one and pulls his hair back – at least it occupies his hands and his mind for a while. He looks odd with his hair tied back, it highlights his big jutting ears. And it makes him look younger.

Dwalin frowns sceptically, although in the end he relents, grumbling, and takes a tie. “Last time you were right – more or less – maybe you have a point here, too.”

_How gracious of you, Master Dwarf!_

You manage to bite back that comment, as well as the laugh. Dwalin with his partly bald head looked hilarious with the rest of his hair tied together in his neck.

Thorin thinks so, too. After a quick glance at his old friend he faces you and declines the offer. “It’s bad enough that I let you talk me into this. I don’t have to look ridiculous as well.”

A throaty growl and a sinister eye are answer to that.

You shrug your shoulders. “That’s up to you. But don’t say I didn’t warn you!“

You line up in one of the middle rows – there’re the shortest queues – and soon it’s your turn.

Dwalin, who was standing at the back until now, pushes past you to the front. Since Thorin’s comment the warrior hasn’t spoken a word to his friend and king. And now he claims a seat as far away from him as possible. Kili follows him, then you take the next seat and Thorin gets the last one.

You pull the stirrup close and press it tight against your thighs.

“That’s all?” Dwalin asks, his voice a little higher than normal.

“Yeah, that’s all. And it’s enough. Really!“

Nonetheless sceptical the dwarves pull their stirrups close as well.

The employees do their rounds and check every stirrup on their way. Next you know the signals turn green and you start to move.

Beside you Thorin’s hands are clamped around the stirrups, very tight. Kili on your other side wiggles nervously with his feet and taps his hands on his stirrup to a melody you don’t recognize.

You leave the hall and gape upon the enormous ascent of the Silverstar. Startled gasps sound in unison next to you. Apparently all three of them have forgotten about the damn _height_ of this ride over the long wait. Thorin peers at the peak on the top stoically, but his face is paler than before. Dwalin on the left side starts to realise that he can not only look all the way down to the ground on his left, but also between his legs. He fixes his eyes on the seat in front of him, hands clutching tight around the handles, and from time to time he pulls at his stirrup again, hoping to snap it one notch tighter.

At the beginning Kili looks around, wide eyed and thoughtful, observes the cars on the parking lot and the people, watching them getting smaller and smaller. But soon the height gets to him. You hear his quiet whispering in your direction: “It’s too late to get out now, isn’t it?”

To soothe his fears a bit you put your hand on his, even though you start to feel queasy because of the height yourself. Contrary to the dwarves you, however, know that you’ll cheer not later than halfway down.

“It’s normal to be a bit afraid. You can always close your eyes then you won’t notice the height so much.”

He follows your advice almost instantly.

You get higher and higher and you start to wonder if the Silverstar has always been _that_ high.

“We’re still not at the top?” Kili whispers, his voice thin.

“Almost.”

He opens his eyes – you haven’t seen that coming.

Finally you reach the peak. The first rows dip forwards and this time your companions realise the enormity of their decision. There’s no turning back now, the only way is down, if they want to or not.

“Mahal help us!”

The time is up. You tilt over the peak. At first you can’t see the rails in front of you and then you drop. Like every time you can’t breathe for the first few seconds while you’ve got the feeling that your stomach is squeezing itself into your neck from below. But after that you give vent to a mighty whoop of joy! The only sound around you is that of cries: a few screeching teenager at the front, excited jeering from behind, deep cries from your right side and a higher voice from your left, though that one doesn’t sound so panicky.

You climb the next hill and you can see, from the corner of your eye, the typical adrenalin grin on Kili’s face. You fall again and the teenager-shrieking begins anew. But this time it stays quiet next to you.

Like most of the others you raise your arms high over your head, just enjoying the ride. At the next drop Kili joins you.

Jaunty, the ride tilts to the side in the next curve. Your hands slightly tap against Kili’s. At the same time a bunch of black hair hits you right in the face. It’s just for a moment but at this speed it’s not exactly pleasant.

And the rollercoaster ride goes on. You actually believe to hear a laugh from your left side, though you’re not sure.

The ride draws to a close. There’s only a sharp bend to the right, then left again and brake. The wagon dips abruptly and again a wave of black hits your face. Only this time it hurts!

A surprised cry of pain escapes your lips and your hand cups your burning cheek on instinct.

The screeching in the front row stopped – finally – and is taken over by noises of excitement and relief. Similar to the sounds beside you. As soon as Thorin realises that it’s over he downright slumps in his seat. Dwalin scrubs his hands over his face, breathing deeply. “I could do with a beer now!”

And Kili…

Kili’s grin is so broad he’s hardly able to form words. „That… that… the previous stuff… it’s NOTHING compared to THIS!“

You ride into the hall and exit the wagon as soon as your stirrups open. You notice that Thorin isn’t as sure on his feet as usual. So you ease your companions aside to let the other passengers leave. This way you give Thorin a moment to collect himself.

One look is all it takes to tell you loud and clear that Thorin obviously isn’t the type for rollercoaster rides. You’re not sure if it’s because of the height or the speed. Anyway, he’s still pale and shaky – although he tries to hide it, of course. Kili on the other hand gives a perfect ‘Hammy on energy drink’ impression – the squirrel from ‘Over the Hedge’.

His eyes are shining and his cheeks are red. And all this excess energy makes him bobbing up and down and skipping all around you. It would drive you mad if it wasn’t so funny.

That’s when you hear a hearty, rumbling laughter. Turning around you see Dwalin raising a matted strand of Thorin’s hair between his fingertips.

“Who’s looking ridiculous now?”

Thorin pushes his hand away and stomps towards the exit. The other dwarves follow him laughing – it wasn’t that bad after just this one ride but even now combing would be painful.

While taking the stairs down you take your scrunchie out and shake your hair until part of it falls back in your face. It feels good to have it loose again.

Thorin’s seems to be in a hurry and you follow him quickly. Dwalin and Kili free their hair on the way and give your hair ties back.

You’re the last from your ride to leave the building and head over to the rest of your group, sitting on benches among the shades.

“You’re still alive!” Gloin calls out to you – there’s a bit too much surprise in your voice for your liking.

Immediately Kili rushes to his brother and puts his hands on Fili’s shoulders. “This was sooooo great, Fili. You won’t believe it! At first it goes up and up and up and you just want out and then suddenly you look down and you can’t see the rails and then you fall and it lifts you out of your seat and then you’re back down again and you’re pressed into your seat and you can only scream. It just feels so incredibly marvellous!”

Yours is not the only look that turns more and more amazed at Kili’s monologue. He has actually managed it without a single breath!

_Overdose of adrenalin!_

“I’m loath to repeat myself but I could REALLY do with a beer now!” Dwalin says.

Balin shakes his head and instead turns towards Thorin who subtly stays in the background, leaning seemingly casual against a small tree.

“Thorin, are you alright? You look… unwell… and… and what happened to your hair?”

At first Thorin gave the impression of answering but after the ‘hair’ comment he just growls. Which makes Dwalin laugh again.

You notice the ‘ri’- brothers, Bombur and Bofur. “How was your Crepes?”

“Our what?” Questions and confusion clear in their eyes.

You roll your eyes and step closer. “Well, the filled pancakes you were going to buy… mmh, Nutella, good choice.”

“They’ve been delicious… but difficult to eat,” Ori responds.

“Nutella?” Bofur asks, again confused.

You call upon your patience and grab one half of his moustache between thumb and index finger to bend it upwards. Nutella remains still cling to it – now in his direct line of sight.

“THAT is Nutella, Bofur.”

“Oh, that!” Bofur’s eyes start to gleam. “More than delicious!” Next you know he snaps his beard from your fingers and puts the end of it into his mouth.

Nori, who’s standing right behind Bofur, stares at you. “What happened to your face?” That makes the others prick up their ears as well.

He steps closer and pushes your hair back behind your ear with a careful touch to have a better look at your cheek. Now the others also see the probably bright red scratch on the right side of your face.

“That wasn’t there earlier,” Dwalin observes.

“Yeah, what happened?” Kili also wants to know.

Even Thorin turns towards you and looks interested.

You return his gaze and ask: “Everything fine again?”

Confused by the sudden change of topic he frowns and answers in the affirmative.

“Good!” You turn back to Nori. „This,“ you point at your cheek, „is a keepsake of Thorin’s.

A loud and mostly incredulous “WHAT” resounds from all around you.

“That’s an allegation! I would never…” Thorin instantly rails against you, as he finds himself wrongfully incriminated.

You just raise your eyebrow. “Is that so? Maybe not intentional. But if you clearly see in advance that the ride might be a fast and curvy one where you could get thrown around. And if you then wear metal beads in your hair, maybe then you should listen to the person who advises you to tie your hair together!”

He just stands there, open mouthed, interrupted in the middle of his sentence, but no word comes out of him now. Understanding slowly shows in his eyes.

To your surprise some malignant glances are turned towards the king, even though none of the dwarves dares to openly reprimand him. Except for Dwalin, of course, though it’s only a quiet but a cynical comment. “I prefer ridiculous.”

“I… I’m sorry. I’ve never thought of that.“

You accept his apology with a nod. “But Thorin,” your voice turns quiet and ominous, “you owe me!”

For a while he just faces you – the other dwarves follow your conversation as if it were a tennis match.

His intense gaze rests upon you, then he sighs.

And he nods.

 

 

 


	5. A little bit of water hasn't hurt anyone yet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Fjord Rafting time! What can possibly go wrong?

 

**_A little bit of water hasn’t hurt anyone yet_ **

  

„You owe me, Thorin Oakenshield!“ you remind the grumpy looking dwarf next to you by pointing at your cheek.

“Aye, she’s right,” Oin agrees with you.

Again Thorin looks out over the railing of the little bridge. His gaze gets even darker than before. He crosses his arms pointedly when he turns back at you.

“Very well,” he growls into his beard.

Oin shrugs and joins you. “Compared to all the rest this actually looks quite harmless.”

“That’s three of us which means there’re still three places left.” And with a huge grin you add: “Any volunteers?“

Gloin’s just shaking his hands in a negative gesture in front of his chest while Dori takes an almost horrified step backwards. “No way, ever!”

Nori steps towards the high railing and gazes down between two bars to look at the waves and the big round boat with lots of laughing and partly shrieking people on it.

“Looks like fun to me. Ori? You wanna ride?”

Ori’s eyes lighten up – after some roller coasters he’d grown to like this stuff – and before Dori can comment on getting wet and getting a cold Ori’d taken up position next to his other brother.

“Of course!”

Bifur declined, just like Balin.

„Dwalin?“ Thorin asks. He’s visibly trying for a neutral intonation but you can tell by looking at him that he would really like to have the warrior and friend at his side for this.

Dwalin just laughs. “Oh no Thorin, you’ve made your bed yourself, now you have to lie in it yourself. But I’d love to watch you from up here.”

Bofur takes a look around but his brother is still standing at the kiosk with Kili and Fili. Obviously they can’t decide which fish sandwich they’d like. Their loss!

“I’m in. A bit of water hasn’t hurt anyone yet!”

“Great, we’re complete. It’s best if you wait either here or at that bridge over there. See you later!”

Then you link arms with Bofur and Thorin to stroll to the entrance of the Fjord Rafting Tour.

 

Amazingly you don’t have to wait too long. Nori and Bofur start placing bets on who’s going to get the wettest – you place your money on Nori, just because you want to know how the ‘drowned rat’ look would suit his hairstyle. It could get pretty funny indeed. Ori tries to tell Oin about his roller coaster ride but he has to repeat himself many times with Oin’s hearing problems. And Thorin just stands there and scowls at the water and the boats floating past that you start to wonder why the water wasn’t freezing over already.

“Hey, it isn’t so bad, you know,” you try to snap him out of his gloom with a soft pat on the shoulder.

He just snorts and you think you hear him whispering something like ‘that’s what you said last time’.

Now you really have to bite back a grin.

And suddenly it’s your turn. Skilfully you step onto the rotating platform and wave the dwarves towards the next free boat. Nori jumps nimbly onto the platform, instinctively grabbing for the arm of his brother as Ori starts stumbling. Thorin and Bofur follow them. Oin has hardly put a foot onto the platform when he’s already almost kissing the floor.

“Oy, who _builds_ such trip hazards?” Ranting on while you help him back to his feet and eventually into the boat – just like one of the employees. In the end both of you aren’t interested in Oin falling into the water instead of entering the boat.

Ori and Bofur have found seats at the opposite side of the entry and Nori sits left of you. On your right side Thorin still stays up indecisive while Oin takes a seat next to him.

“You should sit down Thorin!” you warn him.

“My seat is wet,” he states so dryly that you have to press your hand against your mouth to not explode with laughter.

“Then have fun when we’re colliding with the wall for the first time!”

He fixes his sinister gaze upon you. In the end he rolls his eyes, sighing, and resigns himself to his fate by sitting down. And just in time ‘cause the next moment carries you out of the entry area and you float down the white water.

“Snuggish,” Bofur states and leans back relaxed.

“That’ll change soon, there’re the first waves,” Nori reports as he’s sitting in direction of their travel.

Ori and Bofur turn around and look past their seats to see something, too.

“And off we go!” Bofur exclaims with anticipation.

Your vehicle dips to the side into a well just as the wave rolls at you. Splashing heavily a torrent of water gushes over the steps between Bofur and Thorin and spills over the king’s lap.

Thorin hisses, surprised by the cold of the water, and tenses up with shock at first, until his face morphed into this special ‘figures’-expression.

And while Oin is still wiping at his damp shin Bofur starts to guffaw. You can’t bite back at least a grin just like the others – not even Oin. But how are you supposed to stay serious at Thorin’s disgusted look down at his drenched crotch?

Bofur laughs so hard he’s holding his belly and tears run down his cheeks. In the background the thundering of a waterfall resounds.

Again your boat dips into a well and this time your boat has no chance, too, not with the weight of six people.

With a mighty leap the new wave is close, rises up against the backrest and swashes straightaway onto head and neck of Bofur.

His laughing dies instantly. With a start he begins shaking from the cold and wetness. His hat might have saved most of his head but everything else had been running from his neck into his beard – if he hadn’t been laughing so hard and hadn’t leant forward so far, his hat would have most likely saved him completely.

This time you can’t bite it back, you burst out laughing. The same with Nori. Even Oin is chuckling into his beard and Ori is grinning from ear to ear, even though his shoulder was hit by the water as well.

You’re all still laughing when Bofur sits up straight again – and it can’t be pleasant with all that water in his back. His beard hangs down limp and heavy from the water instead of happily bobbing around matching the mirror-inverted bent form of his earflaps.

This time it’s Nori who’s almost rolling over the floor with laughter. Even Thorin shows an amused smirk.

Your ride leads you into a cave. Between darkness and artificial mist it’s absolutely impossible to see anything. In exchange you can all hear the splashing of water getting louder by the second.

Finally back in daylight you try to orient yourself – which you manage quicker than the dwarves seeing as you know the route.

You spin directly towards the machine that creates the waves.

“Oh great,” moans Thorin as he follows your gaze.

“And again,” Oin sighs with feigned dramatics. His eyes clearly betray his fun.

Miraculously you evade bigger catastrophes but your eyes stay fixed on the waves.

At least until you hear a voice, or more precisely roaring laughter.

“Look at Bofur!”

At once you look up. And there they are: Dwalin who’s loud roaring almost drowns out the water; Dori who anxiously peers at his brothers; Balin and Bombur, both grinning and… wait, some were missing. Fili, Kili, Gloin and Bifur were nowhere in sight.

Before Bofur’s able to shout a fitting response at Dwalin you’ve passed the bridge and the rapids have carried you away.

You collide a few times with the walls until a rushing sound announces a new disaster.

“Break’s over!” you proclaim.

The suddenly appearing waves behind a curve make your boat lurch. Your companions are mindful of the waves again, but you know danger threatens from something else here. Indeed, your concerns prove to be true. The rest of the dwarves are crouched together at the railing next to the stream. Fili stands at the fence pointing towards you, Bifur next to him is waving. Gloin is behind them with a nasty grin on his face and then there’s Kili who’s positioned behind one of those big spray guns.

Your boat spins in the waves – it had bypassed them quite neatly with just a few minor ‘water-incidences’: Ori’s knee and his right arm got wet.

Instinctively you duck down to make yourself as small as possible next to Nori’s body.

The others frown at you while Nori lifts his arm to look at you uncomprehendingly.

“What are you do…”

He doesn’t get further. A thick spurt of water hits him directly in the face. Snorting he lifts his arms to protect his face, but the water still hits him, soaking his hair and his sleeve and runs down his side to seep into his thigh until it finally changes direction. The water hits some others too, but only shortly then you’re leaving the area and therefore the danger zone.

Huffing heavily Nori shudders, still staring at his sodden sleeve dumbfounded.

“Where the hell did that come from?” he asks blankly and clearly angry.

Ori just points upwards, giggling like mad and with tears in his eyes. There the culprits lean against the railing of the bridge, enjoying themselves and waving at you.

Abruptly Nori turns towards you. “You knew!”

You just shrug and bite your lips. Nori’s left side of his face is sopping wet, his left braid of his beard is actually dripping and the left spike of his hair hangs down as limp as Bofur’s beard.

It’s too much. You burst out laughing. And everyone joins in. Except for Thorin, of course, but even he is actually grinning broadly.

Apart from a fine drizzle you’re spared from the last waterfalls and you don’t even realise that a picture is taken of you. When you’re finally lifted out of the water back to the entry area Nori is laughing with you.

Swiftly you jump out of the boat onto the rotating platform to help Oin out. Together you watch Nori who holds his left arm at a weird angle away from his body and Thorin who stalks straddle-legged out of the boat. Ori followed them grinning and Bofur pushes back his shoulders so he wouldn’t have to feel his wet clothes against his back anymore.

A little girl in the waiting area was staring at you. Then she pulled at her mother’s shirt, making her parents and her brother look at her.

“I don’t want to do this anymore, mama! Look at them, look how wet they are!”

You look at your group and you can’t help yourself, you have to ask: “Who’s won the bet?”

Nori and Bofur look at each other, taken by surprise. Finally they shrug their shoulders.

“Seems to end in a draw,” Bofur said.

“This time!” Nori got that straight right away.

Your picture’s hilarious. Nori’s indignant expression together with his destroyed hairstyle, surrounded by lots of snickering.

Slowly you get back to the others who don’t even try to mask their chuckling.

Fili’s and Kili’s grin is the broadest of them all. Nori laughs and steps up to them, slightly shaking his head. Placing himself between the two princes he puts his arms around their shoulders – the wet one on Kili – and laughs with them. At least until they feel safe.

The next moment his hands grab their necks. Harshly he pulls their heads in front of his body till their startled squeak is interrupted by the crashing sound of their connecting temples.

“Ouch!” they cry out simultaneously.

But Nori doesn’t let them go like expected, instead he pushes their heads a bit down and rudely shoves them away from the others.

“I’ve got an axe to grind with the both of you!”

 

 

 


End file.
